Today we made it to our weekly coffee group after a perfectly timed morning nap. And I like coffee group, don't get me wrong, but it always messes with my head a little bit. It's great to get out with other moms, and not feel shy about breastfeeding or your baby pooping in public, and nobody minds if you're an hour late, or your baby is crying. It's about as low key as you can get, as far as outings with a baby are concerned. But without fail, every time I go to coffee group, I can't help but start to compare babies. I suppose it's only natural, but I hate it, and I just can't help myself. Like today, for example, I confirmed my previous opinion that Riley is of course the cutest baby (totally not biased at all). And then, while we were there, you can't help but look at what all the babes are doing. This baby is talking (babbling) so much, that baby is really grabbing toys, those babies are pushing up on their arms during tummy time, that baby is so content to lay on the floor and play... and on and on.
And then one by one, babies would start to get tired, and they would just effortlessly fall asleep. Some in their car seats, some in another room, some on the floor, some while nursing... just peacefully go to la-la land. My little bundle would NEVER do that. There is way too much noise and excitement for her to sleep. And she basically only sleeps in my arms. So then I start to worry. And second guess myself. What am I doing wrong? Will she ever sleep on her own? Am I holding her too much? And I leave coffee group just a little discouraged.
But then I get home, and I start to think. Sure, Riley is a bit more, um, challenging to get to sleep. Sure some days it takes me a while to get her to bed. And yes, some days she takes all her naps in my arms/with me in bed (mostly because she is still not sleeping through the night so I am in NEED of a nap or two or three). And yes, it would be so much easier to just plop her in her crib and say goodnight. But she's not going to want to sleep in my arms forever. And clearly, for some reason, even since day 1 in the hospital, she has needed a little extra love and attention to get to sleep. She needs me. And while it might not be the most convenient thing, motherhood and raising children is not about being convenient. So for now, while I still can, I'm cutting myself (and my baby) some slack. If she needs a little extra love to get to sleep, I can give that to her. And I will. No matter what people say, or think. I think that's the other thing that bothers me, is what people think. And it really shouldn't. I mean, I can raise MY baby the way I see fit, right? But there's part of me that doesn't want to tell people she still naps in my arms. Or I have to rock her to sleep every single time. But is that really so bad?? I figure, it used to take me 20-30 minutes to get her to sleep for naps, now if I time it right, it only takes me 5. I can do that. I LIKE doing that. I shouldn't care what other people think. Every baby is different!
And sleeping aside, sooner or later, she'll also learn to use those little arms to lift herself up. Either that or she will be a master at rolling over to avoid tummy time at all costs. Whatev. By the way, that tongue? That's a sign of real concentration. That and the huge grunts she does every time she's on her tummy.
And then one by one, babies would start to get tired, and they would just effortlessly fall asleep. Some in their car seats, some in another room, some on the floor, some while nursing... just peacefully go to la-la land. My little bundle would NEVER do that. There is way too much noise and excitement for her to sleep. And she basically only sleeps in my arms. So then I start to worry. And second guess myself. What am I doing wrong? Will she ever sleep on her own? Am I holding her too much? And I leave coffee group just a little discouraged.
But then I get home, and I start to think. Sure, Riley is a bit more, um, challenging to get to sleep. Sure some days it takes me a while to get her to bed. And yes, some days she takes all her naps in my arms/with me in bed (mostly because she is still not sleeping through the night so I am in NEED of a nap or two or three). And yes, it would be so much easier to just plop her in her crib and say goodnight. But she's not going to want to sleep in my arms forever. And clearly, for some reason, even since day 1 in the hospital, she has needed a little extra love and attention to get to sleep. She needs me. And while it might not be the most convenient thing, motherhood and raising children is not about being convenient. So for now, while I still can, I'm cutting myself (and my baby) some slack. If she needs a little extra love to get to sleep, I can give that to her. And I will. No matter what people say, or think. I think that's the other thing that bothers me, is what people think. And it really shouldn't. I mean, I can raise MY baby the way I see fit, right? But there's part of me that doesn't want to tell people she still naps in my arms. Or I have to rock her to sleep every single time. But is that really so bad?? I figure, it used to take me 20-30 minutes to get her to sleep for naps, now if I time it right, it only takes me 5. I can do that. I LIKE doing that. I shouldn't care what other people think. Every baby is different!
And sleeping aside, sooner or later, she'll also learn to use those little arms to lift herself up. Either that or she will be a master at rolling over to avoid tummy time at all costs. Whatev. By the way, that tongue? That's a sign of real concentration. That and the huge grunts she does every time she's on her tummy.
Today I put her on her tummy for a little extra practice, and she is one stubborn baby!! She either (1) refused to lift her head, and happily sucked on her hand or the blanket she was lying on, (2) rolled right over on to her back or (3) cried. Haha. She sure know what she wants (or doesn't want, in this case)!
And because this post wasn't long enough... I got a job! Starting in January, I am going to be a home educator! Basically it's like running a daycare in my house. Win-win situation for me, I get to stay home with Riley, and make a little extra money. As of right now, I will be looking after one little boy twice a week, and he's about 6 weeks younger than Riley. I also have 2 or 3 more people interested in having me watch their children a couple days a week, so we'll see! I don't want to have more than 2 kids at a time (Riley and one other) so that I can really give them a lot of attention, and so I don't stretch myself too thin. But I am SO happy to be able to be making a little bit of money without having to leave Riley!! And she can make some friends. :) This is GREAT news! Wow that was a lot of exclamation points in one paragraph (and I even went back and deleted some).
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